Questioning

I am always wondering what life would be like if I was someone different. And yet, I feel that I probably would want to be me again. There are certain things that I have to deal with on an everyday basis that I know very few others can even understand or want to know. Which is why I have resulted to the infamous blog. So I can scream and whine and not a soul can say anything to me...especially if i disable comments.

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Some days...

I have to say that I am sick of being sick. Tired of the hospital stays and doctors. Tired of well wishers and concerned emails, texts, and phone calls. It's not that I don't appreciate them, it's that I am constantly having to remember all the drama of this pregnancy. I live it everyday.
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32 weeks!?!

If you are keeping count, 32 weeks has come and gone and now I am being told to hang on until at least 34 weeks. Considering that I am in significantly less pain now since the blood transfusion, I believe I can do it physically. But mentally I have hit a block a few weeks back where all I did was cry over the guilt of wanting little man out and being exhausted from the amount of things that are happening during this pregnancy. I am so hard on myself but I find solace in the fact that I have handled this situation with understanding and determination; what mother wouldn't? I tell myself "one day at a time" or as on Finding Nemo "just keep swimming" and rely on close friends and family for that extra boost of support. I am holding out and taking it as easy as I can but as some symptoms and pain decrease, others ramp up their efforts which are a normal part of pregnancy. I have a list of complaints but I will save it for those unsuspecting sympathetic ears. --Yes,
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Excuse Me Mr. Hughley & Ms. Kaling

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Interesting how sickle cell disease continues to be a joke when we all know it's anything but. If you're laughing with D.L. Hughley and Mindy Kaling, then you don't know a Sickle Cell Warrior or caregiver personally.  Let me set the record straight:  SICKLE CELL DISEASE IS NOT A JOKE. Period . I could leave it at that, but I won't. Ask anyone that knows someone affected by it. At any given time, our own bodies renounce us at the cellular level. This leaves us with, at the least, debilitating pain, and at the extreme, death. And guess what? It never ends. It will never stop. We will never grow out of it. It will continue to get worse until our bodies can't take it anymore.  So, tell me, how is this something to joke about?  Let's address the most common misconceptions.  Sickle Cell is NOT  just a black disease.  While it is true that the most affected people are of African descent, it is thought to be a genetic adaptation to offset malaria.  Malaria is common in
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